My fight against this cancer mass
Is ending soon, and I will pass,
Or, more precisely, I will die,
And neither hell nor heaven high
Will take my life—I will not be,
The real is only what we see,
For I’m an atheist in truth,
A path I’ve taken since my youth.
When cancer wins, I will return
To nothing, though my body burn
To ashes, though my wife recall
My face, while pacing through the hall;
And faded photos, memories—
I will exist in only these.
The end is here, I’m feeling sick,
But suddenly—is this a trick?—
My mind is feeling free like air,
I have no pain, I’m everywhere!
But just as suddenly, it ends,
My senses fall, awareness blends
Into a body, strangely stiff.
Is this a dream? But oh, what if…
Hallucinations from my brain
Are fooling me as I remain
Confined to bed and still alive,
My breathing done, I am deprived
Of oxygen, my brain refills
My senses with new psychic thrills…
But no! Within my hand I find
A gun! And in my battered mind
I feel the need to take a life,
My conscience never knew this strife;
Contention in my mind appears,
The devil laughs and jibes and jeers;
He knows that he will win at last,
My better nature is outcast.
Now all around, I see my peers,
And this just serves to stoke my fears;
Inside the room, the cyborgs stand,
All heeding what their masters planned;
We know our task, it gives us joy,
To seek the foe and fast destroy;
And what was left of human care
Evaporates into thin air.
At last the doors are opened wide,
We take one look and run outside;
The world out here has not a clue
About our plans or what we’ll do…
(written c. July 2019)
Reinmachination [ri:’ɪn mæ’ʃɪ neɪ’ʃən] = reincarnation + machine
And the businessmen of the earth will cry and weep for her [Babylon]. They will be sad because now there is no one to buy the things they sell. They sell gold, silver, jewels, pearls, fine linen cloth, purple cloth, silk, and red cloth…. They sell the bodies and souls of men.
—Revelation 18:11-13 (ICB, abridged)